Writer's Block: The Meaning of Love

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Gosh, that's a big question.

I think love is something you do. It's an active verb, not a passive adjective, as it were. I think it's about sharing something of your true self with your beloved - which doesn't mean it's not selfish, nor that it's always returned in equal measure or even at all. But I also think it can easily get complicated by all kinds of other feelings. Jealousy or obsession, for example, aren't love but can sometimes accompany love.

I think that genuinely liking others is just as important, including those you love. 'Like' might not sound as brave and noble as 'love', but it can be a lot harder, and it can do a lot more good in the world.

If I were looking back at my life from my deathbed right now, I would be proud as anything of my marriage. 25 years, and we still love each other, we still like each other, and on the good days (there are many of them) we're still in love, too. That's a true acheivement in this life. But to be totally honest the other thing I want to acheive is creative fulfillment. I want to write (and hopefully publish) novels and stories that mean something to me. So successful love and successful creativity are the two most important things in the world to me.

I have felt this way for a long time now. Decades. But there was a time when love alone was the most important thing. Maybe it still would be if I didn't feel I'd now acheived it...? Hhhmmm... more to ponder.